"Are you sure you want to do it again this year?  One of these times somebody is going to figure out it's you."

 

“Oh, Jason, who’s going to recognize me wearing the Santa outfit and white beard?  Nobody ever suspects a thing.  You worry more now than back when you pulled strings to get me the job.”

 

“Why take the chance?  Sure, you’ve had a lot of fun with this, but your streak of luck is going to run out sometime.  Maybe some woman will recognize your voice and get suspicious and try to pull the beard off.”

 

“I just don’t think that will happen.  Jason, I know you’re just looking out for me, but this is the only chance I have to interact with people.  When I staged that whole thing in ‘77, I wanted to get out of the public eye, but I didn’t want to become a hermit.  Heck, I really like talking to the kids.  I’ve looked forward to this for eleven months, and I’m gonna do it.”

 

“I knew you would.”  Jason sighed.  “But I had to try.”

 

“Well, thanks for caring, but . . . you know what?  I believe I need a few days in costume to get into character.  Be back in a minute.”  He turned and scurried out of the large living room, humming "Jingle Bells."

 

He returned in two minutes, stopped just inside the main door, and raised his arms outstretched.   “Ho, ho, ho.   Merry Christmas.”

 

In his red and white costume and white beard he made a distinctive Santa Claus.  “You know, Jason, this suit has been taken-in twice, now.  That diet you make me eat sure has taken off the pounds. 

 

“I’ve seen other Santa’s that weren’t fat.  You look splendid, and you’re a lot healthier.”

 

“Yeah, that’s cool.”  He walked toward Jason.  “Between now and when the gig starts, I’m wearing this outfit, and you need to call me Santa.”

 

Jason smiled.  “Very well . . . . Now that that’s settled, would you like to head down to the pool table and watch me whoop Santa’s butt?”

 

"Don't be a smart-ass, or Santa won't give you any presents."  They laughed and headed down the hallway.

 

Jason drove the brand-new, 1983 black Cadillac into the mall parking lot.  Santa was in the passenger seat, checking out all the shoppers.  They continued around back to a door marked ‘Mall Offices.’

 

“What time should I pick you up for lunch?” Jason asked.

 

“Ah, you don’t have to bother.  I think I’ll just find out when the mall secretaries have their lunch break and join them.”

 

“You sound pretty certain they won’t mind you tagging along.”

 

“Hey, I’m Santa Claus.  Everybody’s nice to me.  Besides, I’ve still got that old charm.”

 

“Okay, okay, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of company during lunch.  I’ll pick you up at four.”

 

“Right, unless one of my lunch friends wants me to go home with her after work.”

 

“Are you still hoping to pull off that crazy idea of yours -- making love without ever taking off the Santa Claus beard?”

 

”It could happen.”

 

Jason shrugged.  “Right, see you at four.”

 

Santa took his place in the mall, and during the next three hours, he talked with dozens of children.  His voice became scratchy, his throat dry, so he asked one of the helpers to get him a soda.  While waiting for her, Santa stood and stretched.  He noticed the good-looking, five-year-old boy at the head of the line, fidgeting at the delay.

 

The helper returned with a 48-ounce monster cup.  Just as Santa put it to his lips, he heard a woman yell, “Todd, no.  Come back here.”  Santa turned as the boy jumped on his lap and slammed into the soda, dumping it onto his costume.

 

The boy’s mother hurried to them.  “Todd, look what you’ve done.  That was very, very naughty.  Oh, Santa, I’m so sorry Todd spilled your drink.  We both apologize . . . I wish I had a towel to offer you.  You’re really soaked.”

 

“It might not be a problem.  If I take my lunch break now, maybe it’ll dry before I need to come back.”

 

“That’s going to take a while to dry.  I’ll tell you what; my Aunt Mary has the craft shop here in the mall.  Why don’t you come with me to her store, change into one of her ceramic smocks, and I’ll run your wet clothes over to the mall dry-cleaners for some emergency service.  They ought to do that for Santa Claus.”

 

“I guess you’re right.”

 

“Good.  Santa, please come with me this way.”  She reached out and took his hand.  “My name is Judy Parker.  Sorry we had to meet under these circumstances.”

 

Todd was already holding her other hand.  She led the way to a quaint craft shop.  They entered the store, and she pointed out her Aunt Mary attending to a customer.  Judy gave her a small wave but did not stop, and they went into the back-room behind the sales counter.  Judy took a smock from a hook and handed it to Santa.  “You can change in that bathroom over there.”

 

In less than a minute, he changed and handed her the soggy clothes.

 

“Santa, I’ll just drop this off and come right back.”  Judy headed for the door.  “Will you be all right here with Todd for a few minutes?”

 

“Oh, sure, Judy.  We’ll be fine.”

 

“Okay, Aunt Mary ought to be done with her customer soon and join you.”

 

After she left, Santa asked, “Well, Todd, tell me what you want for Christmas.”

 

Todd eagerly recited a long wish-list of presents.  Then he noticed the shiny gold pendulum around Santa’s neck.  It was visible behind his beard when he turned his head. “What’s that on your necklace, Santa?  It looks like lightning.”

 

“That’s right.  It’s a lightning bolt.”

 

 “And letters, too,” Todd said.  “That’s ‘T’, and ‘C’, and ‘B’.  What do they stand for?”

 

“Well, aahh, I really can’t tell you.  But I could tell you a make-believe story if you’d like.”

 

“Oh, yes, please, Santa.”

 

“Well, let’s see . . . aahh, maybe the ‘C’ could stand for Claus.  Yeah.  Like in Santa Claus.  That’s good.  ‘C’ is for Claus.  Now, let’s see, the ‘T’ might stand for . . . aahh . . . The Claus . . . The Claus what?  Aahh . . . The Claus . . . Brothers.  That’s it.  The Claus Brothers.  So, this could be the medallion worn by the eight Claus Brothers.”

 

Todd’s face brightened.  “So, it would be like if you had seven brothers, right Santa?”

 

“Yes, and each one brings presents to kids in a different part of the world.  Heck, one man couldn’t do it all in one night.  It takes all eight Claus brothers.”

 

“Wow, this is a good story.  Tell me more about your brothers, Santa.  What are their names?”

 

“Aaaahh, let’s see.  Well, there’s Vernon Claus, and Aron Claus, and Jesse Claus, and Scotty Claus, and D.J. Claus.  How many was that?”

 

“Five.”

 

“Oh, two more, huh.  How about . . . I know, there’s one Claus brother that nobody likes.  His name is Colonel Claus.

 

“How come nobody likes him?”

 

“Well, he’s greedy.  He keeps half the presents for himself.”

 

“Oh, that’s mean . . . Who’s the last one?”

 

“The last one is Elvis Claus, Santa’s favorite brother.  Elvis Claus is really cool.  I let him deliver the presents to Hawaii every year.”

 

Judy Parker walked through the door.  Santa grimaced.  He had counted on having time before she returned to emphasize he was only kidding about the Claus Brothers.

 

“Mom, you should’ve heard all the good stuff Santa and I talked about.  He told me about the eight Claus brothers, and about Elvis Claus being Santa’s favorite, and how Elvis Claus gets to deliver the presents to the kids in Hawaii.”

 

Santa immediately spoke.  “Well, Todd, remember I said --”

 

Judy Interrupted, “Todd, will you please go up front and join Aunt Mary at the counter.  Santa and I need to talk.”  Her body was rigid, and her jaws were clenched.

 

Todd left the room and closed the door.

 

Santa started to talk, but Judy lashed out, “Listen, you big jerk.  Where do you come off telling Todd those ridiculous things?  Children stop believing in Santa all too soon, without idiots like you ruining the legend.  Todd’s a gullible little boy.  It’s hard enough for him already, with his father and I divorced, and then you have to fill his head with lies.  I’m sorry I ever left him alone with you.”

 

She paused to get her breath.

 

“You’re right, Judy,” Santa said.  “I’m very, very sorry.  But you must know one thing.  I told him clearly that I was just makin’ up a story.  He knew it wasn’t true.  He was just telling you that we had fun with it.”

 

“We’ll see about that.”  She opened the door to the store.  “Todd, honey, could you come here, please”

 

Todd came back into the office, and she asked, “Todd, Santa says he told you he was making up that story about the Claus brothers.  That it was just for fun.  Is that right?”

 

“Oh yeah, mom.  He made it up as we went along.  It was just something to do because he couldn’t tell me the real story about his pendant.”

 

“Thank you, Todd”

 

Judy turned to Santa.  “Your pendant?  Could I see your pendant, please?”

 

He reached behind his beard and brought the pendant into full view.   Judy looked at it closely.  She looked away as though thinking, then looked at the pendant again.  Finally, she looked up at Santa.  A small smile formed on her face.  She appeared pleasantly intrigued.

 

“TCB, huh, with a lightning bolt.  I’ve read about that.”  She squinted her eyes.  “And, let’s see, you said Elvis Claus is Santa’s favorite brother, right?  “You know, I thought your voice sounded familiar before, but I couldn’t place it.”

 

She turned to her son.  “Todd, would you mind going up front just one more time?”

 

Todd gave a disgusted shrug.  “Ah, mom.”

 

“Please honey, it’s important.  Just for a minute.”

 

Todd left, and his mother walked over to Santa and stopped just a foot in front of him.  She looked him straight in the eyes.  “You want me to forgive you for fibbing, don’t you?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Only if you promise to do something for me.”

 

“Yes, of course.  What is it?”

 

“I want you to pull down that beard and let me see your face.”

 

“No, I can’t do that.”

 

“You liar.  First you fill my son’s head with rubbish and then you break a promise to me.  You really are a jerk.  I want to see you without the beard.”

 

She grabbed it and pulled it down, away from his face.

 

Judy gasped.  “Oh, my gosh.  Oh my.”  She let the beard go and the elastic snapped it back in place.  She looked stunned.  Then, the expression on her face changed from amazed to inspired.  She smiled and moved closer, like a cat playing with a toy.

 

“Say, Santa, there is one other way I could forgive you.  Todd’s dad is picking him up here later.  It’s their weekend together, so, I’ll be sort of playing bachelor tonight, if you know what I mean.  How’d you like to come home for dinner with me after your shift?  Maybe later, we can open some presents together.”  She winked at him.  “What do you think?”

 

Santa could barely contain the thrill surging through him.  “Ah, yes ma’am.  You bet.  Thank you, thank you very much.”

 

He thought to himself, Man, Jason is never going to believe this.

 

She thought to herself, Aunt Mary is never going to believe this.

 

©  2005   Philip R Arnold   All Rights Reserved   www.elvisblog.net

 

“Jason, I’ve been thinkin’.  Maybe it’s time to change things this year.”

 

“What do you mean?”  Jason did not look up from the morning paper.

 

“You know, my Santa Claus gig at the mall.”

 

Jason put the paper down and looked across the breakfast table at his friend.  “Oh, no.  That has worked smooth as silk for years.  Why would you want to change it now?”

 

“Well, I still like talking with the kids just fine.  They’re really cool, most of them.  But I’m cravin’ more adult contact.  It gets worse every year.  Don’t get mad, I mean you’re a great friend and all, but I just need to talk to some other people once in a while.”

 

“Okay, okay.  I follow you, but you scare me with some of your ideas.  What do you have in mind?”

 

“Think about this.  There’s other places, besides the malls, that have a guy dressed up like Santa Claus at Christmas – how about that big pet super-store over on the boulevard.”

 

Jason looked surprised.  “Really, you’d do that?  Wouldn’t it be a big come-down, switching from the mall’s fancy North Pole Village to a pet shop?”

 

“I know what you’re thinking, but let me explain.  I saw an ad in the paper last year.  People can bring their dog in to the pet store and have its picture taken with Santa.  Well, I checked it out.  I waited for a really cold day, and I wore my blue parka with the hood pulled tight on my face, and I kept my sunglasses on inside, so nobody noticed me at all.”

 

Jason stiffened, his eyes showed dismay.  “Hey, that’s not what you said would be the deal when you asked me to help you disappear.  That was an unnecessary risk.  See what I mean about you scaring me.”

 

“Yeah, I know.  I’m sorry, Jason, but I was real careful and everything went fine.  So, I watched the whole picture-taking-set-up at the pet store.  They’ve got this wooden platform covered with a green rug.  The dog sits on it in front of the Santa Claus.  Behind them is a screen with a picture of a Christmas tree and stockings hanging from a mantle.  Anyway, there is a lot of chitchat between Santa and the dog owners while the pose is being set up and after the photographer snaps the picture.”

 

Jason got up from the breakfast table and poured more hot coffee into his cup.

“Look, I understand.  You would talk to adults more at the pet store than at the mall, but that just increases the risk.  What about your voice?  You’ll be near people for extended periods of time, having all this chitchat with them.  Somebody is going to recognize you.”

 

“No, Jason, I don’t think so.  This is 1984.  Nobody is thinkin’ about me any more.”  He squirmed in his chair, and then flashed a smile as a new thought came to him.  “Besides, I can talk all educated-like, if I want to, after being around you for seven years.”

 

“Very funny, but I’m not kidding here.  This idea sounds very risky to me.”

 

“Oh, Jason, I can pull this off just fine.  I know I can.”

 

“Well, if you ask me, you just want to change locations this year because you don’t want to run into Judy Parker again.  She made such an impression on you last year, yet you won’t allow yourself to have any more contact with her.  Why didn’t you ever call her after that one night?  From what you said, she was a great lady.”

 

“Yeah, she was, and I think about her a lot, but I just couldn’t.  You know that… So, anyway, what do you think about my new Santa Claus idea?”

 

“I guess there’s no way I can talk you out of it, but please be very careful.  Will you promise me that?”

 

“Yes, Jason, I promise.”

 

“Good.  I suppose you want me to pull some strings and get you the job this year at the pet store?”

 

“Right, would you please?”

 

“I’ll see what I can do.”

 

 

Six weeks later, a new Santa was working at the pet shop, and everything was going smoothly.  He marveled at the clever process used to produce the photos.  A cable connected the camera to a computer.  Customers looked at four proofs on the monitor and decided which one to buy.  Then, in a few seconds, a high quality 8 x 10 picture came out of the computer’s printer.

 

One afternoon, Santa looked up to see who was next, and his gaze froze into a stare.  A handsome man in his late thirties talked softly with the photographer, while a large golden retriever sat patiently at their side.  Santa barely noticed them.  His eyes were fixed on the light-haired boy, about six or seven, who was with them.  Thoughts raced through Santa’s mind.  “That’s Judy parker’s son.  That’s Todd.  What a fine-looking young fellow he is.  He’s sure grown up a lot in the past year.  I can’t believe it.  As much as it hurt, I never once allowed myself to see his mother again, and now he shows up here.”

 

Todd’s father led the retriever to the platform and easily got him to jump up and do ’sit’ and 'stay.'  “Santa, what we’d like to do here is have a picture made of you and the dog and my son.  It’s going to be a Christmas present from him to his mother.”

 

“I came up with the idea all by myself,” Todd chimed in.  “Mom really loves Santa.  Almost as much as Elvis.  She has pictures of both of them pinned up by her desk at home.”

 

Todd’s father raised his eyebrows.  “Well, it’s her house, so I guess she can decorate it any silly way she wants.”

 

Santa did not show the pleasure that news gave him.  “I guess Judy hasn’t remarried.”

 

Todd stood beside Santa, the dog remained in a perfect ‘sit’ position, and the father moved out of camera range.  Within two minutes, the photographer snapped four poses.  Todd’s father went to the monitor, leaving Todd and the dog with Santa.

 

“What’s the dog’s name?” Santa asked.

 

He’s Mac.  My mom and I moved to a house with a real big yard, so we got him.  He’s a great dog.  A lot of fun.”

 

“I’ll bet he is.  Did you train him to behave so good, Todd?”

 

“Hey, how did you know my name?”

 

“Aaaahhh, well, aah.  You know, Santa knows everything.”

 

“Yeah, but you’re not the real Santa.  You’re just a guy dressed up like him.”

 

Santa whispered, “Todd, let me show you something.”  Santa unbuttoned one of his shirt buttons and put his hand in.  It came out holding his pendant.  “Remember this?”

 

“Yes!  You’re that Santa.  Elvis Claus.  And this is the thing that all the Claus brothers wear.  Yeah, TCB.  Wow.  Neat.”

 

“Todd, how’s your mom?  Is she happy?  Did she ever remarry?”

“No, it’s just me and her and Mac, but I get to see dad a lot, too.”

 

“Could you tell her something for me, please?  On Christmas Eve, tell he Elvis Claus thinks about her a lot.  Okay, will you do that?”

 

“Sure, Santa.”

 

“Todd,” the father said as he approached them.  “Let’s get Mac off the platform.  We’re ready to go.”

 

Todd hesitated.  “Bye Santa.  I’ll do that favor.”

 

“What favor is that?” Todd’s father asked.

 

“Aah… to be a good boy.”

 

 

A few days later, near closing time, a college boy was filling in for the regular photographer.  There was no one in line to have their dog’s picture taken with Santa.  He sat still in a folding chair off to the side of the platform, his eyes glazed, his mind lost in his own thoughts.  He did not immediately look up as a woman and a dog came up to the photographer and started talking.

 

The conversation went on for two or three minutes, and gradually the voice of the woman worked through the fog in his head and jolted him.  He looked up.  “It’s Judy.  I can’t believe it.  Todd didn’t wait ‘til Christmas to give her the message.  Oh, man, she sure looks good.”

 

Her auburn hair was perfect, every soft curl looking like it had been sculptured.  Her face was as beautiful as he remembered.  Judy was wearing a thick, but figure-flattering Christmas sweater.  It did almost as much as her tight-fitting jeans to stir Santa’s memories.

 

Santa saw her take five greenbacks from her purse and give them to the photographer, who quickly stuck them in his pocket, not the cash register.  “What’s she doing up there?” he wondered.

 

Judy came toward Santa, leading the retriever.  Santa, this is my dog, Mac.  I believe you met him the other day.”

 

A shiver went down Santa’s back, and he could hardly speak.  “Ah, yes. He’s a great dog.  So well behaved.”

 

“Well, it looks like you get to have your picture taken with him again.  This one’s a present from me to me, and I’m going to be in it.”  She commanded Mac to jump on the platform and sit, which he did perfectly.  Judy turned to Santa with an excited gleam in her eye.  “Okay, how can you and I pose?  I know.  You’re a big strong Santa.  I’ll bet I could sit on your lap like the children do.  How about we try that?”

 

“Aaah… “

 

“Sure, that will work out just fine,” she said.  Judy positioned the folding chair behind the platform.  “All right, Santa, why don’t you sit right here.”

 

He obliged without saying a word.

 

Judy then walked in front of him and swiveled to face the camera.  The back of her nicely packed jeans was now just inches from his face.  She slowly and tantalizingly lowered her bottom on to his right leg.  Not out by the knee.  She sat back as far as possible and wiggled around a bit before getting settled.

 

“That feels fine for me.  How does it feel for you, Santa?”

 

“Aaah, just fine.”  Santa was starting to sweat inside the suit.  He breathed hard to get calm, but succeeded only in over-loading his senses with her perfume.  Her body against his felt wonderful.  He knew she could feel the excitement surging through him.  “Oh, man, what’s she trying to do to me?”

 

“Okay, now.  Let’s pose for the picture,” Judy said.  Santa did not notice as she moved her hand over and grabbed the bottom of his beard.  In a split second, Judy pulled down hard on the beard and yelled “Now.”  The camera flashed.

 

Judy released the beard and it snapped back in place.  She jumped up, but Santa grabbed her arm.  “Judy, what are you doing?  Now my picture is in that computer’s memory.  Are you trying to ruin everything for me?”

 

“No, I am not.  I’ve got this thing under control.  You just sit tight for a couple of minutes while I take care of some business, okay?”

 

Santa didn’t say anything as Judy went to the photographer.  The picture was just coming out of the printer, and she grabbed it before he could.  She stared at it, broke into a big smile, and shouted a loud “YES!”

 

Then Judy got serious.  Santa heard her instruct the photographer, “Now, do the delete command.”  She watched the monitor closely, and then said, Okay, now go to the recycle bin and delete it again.”  Another few seconds, and she asked, “Deleted twice, so it’s completely gone from memory, right?”

 

“Yes, it’s gone.”

 

Judy smiled.  “Okay, the store’s about to close, and you don’t have any customers here, so why don’t you take a break.  I’d like to talk to Santa a little.”  The photographer shrugged and walked off.

 

Judy returned to Santa.  She flashed a big smile and held the photo up in front of him.  “Well, I’ve got my Christmas present.  It’s wonderful, don’t you think?  I Love it.”  She bent down and looked straight into his eyes.  “Would Santa’s favorite brother like to get a present, too?”

 

He had no doubts.  This wonderful, exciting woman had pushed his on-button.  He answered with an enthusiastic, “Oh, man.  I sure would.”

 

Her smile got even wider.  “Todd’s with his Daddy again, so let’s get out of here.  We’ll go to my place, and you can see all the posters of Santa and Elvis I’ve collected.  Then you can have your present.  It’s terrific.”

 

He closed his eyes to savor the flashback.  “Yes, I know it is.”

 

 

©   2006   Philip R Arnold    All Rights Reserved   www.elvisblog.net

 

Jason walked into the living room and sat on the sofa next to his friend.  “I’m afraid I have some bad news.”

“What’s that?”

“Well, as you requested, I contacted the manager of the new North Pointe Mall today.”

 “Uh-oh.  Doesn’t sound like I’m gonna get the Santa Claus gig over there.”

“No, you’re not.  In fact, nobody is.  It turns out they aren’t going to have a Santa this year.”

“No kiddin’.  How come?”

“The manager said not all of the construction will be finished in time.  There’s been big problems with the contractor, causing delays and even a lawsuit.  So, the whole project is months behind schedule.  Only about a third of the stores will be ready and open for this Christmas season.  The rest of stores don’t open until next year.”

“Man, that’s too bad.  I was lookin’ forward to workin’ at that mall. . . . You know, I really don’t want to do my Santa Claus thing at the pet super-store again this year.  Do you think you can get me back in at Mid-Town Plaza where I was two years ago?”

Jason looked uncomfortable as he shifted his position.   “I don’t know.  Maybe.  I’ll try, but there’s a bigger problem at North Pointe.  They’re going to have the center concourse and one wing of the mall blocked off during the Christmas season.  Since they can’t set up any kind of North Pole Village, they’re going to do something simpler.  They’re going to have an Elvis Impersonator.”

Jason flinched as his friend jumped to his feet, a dismayed look on his face.

“What!  Are you kidding me?  They’re not really gonna do that, are they?”

“The mall manager said they are going to have a small stage with a screen behind it that depicts some sort of Christmas scene.  The Elvis guy will be up on stage in front of an old Caddilac convertible, and he’ll sing along with karaoke tapes of “Blue Christmas” and one or two other songs.”

“Oh man, this is too much.  This is killing me.”

“Then, after the singing draws a crowd, the kids will come up and get into the front seat of that Caddy with the Elvis.  He’ll help them talk to Santa back at the North Pole on the CB radio, and then it’s photo time.  The manager figures there’ll be lots of mothers that will hop in the car, too, to get in the picture with Elvis.”

“Man, this isn’t fair.  That sounds like a terrific gig.”  He released a big sigh.  “Ah nuts.”

“The manager thinks they will get lots of press on it, too.  And that will solve their problem of getting people to come to a partly opened mall.”

“He’s right.  It will.  Somebody was a genius for thinking this up.”

Jason laughed.  “I knew you’d say that.  Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh.  This is serious stuff to you.  Anyway, I’ll try to pull some strings and get you back in at the old mall again.”

“Good.  Thanks a lot.”

“You’re welcome, but will you level with me about something?  What’s the real reason you don’t want to go back to the pet store?  Is it because you’re afraid of bumping into Judy Parker again?”

There was no answer.

“I just don’t get it.  You know you care about her.  I’ve watched you do the same thing two years in a row.  After you and Judy have your glorious night together, you come home and talk about her like a kid with puppy love.  Then, you never contact her again, and you get all bummed out because you aren’t with her.  After a while, you just clam up, like you’re trying to shut her out of your memory.  It hasn’t worked.  I’ve seen you sitting alone dozens of times, lost in your thoughts.  You can’t tell me you weren’t thinking about her.  What would be so wrong about seeing her once in a while?”

“Jason, it’s hard to explain.  I would love to be with her, and I know she’d keep my secret.  But, she’s got a young son, Todd, living with her, and if things between us went any farther, it would get very complicated.  My whole deal could come unraveled, and her life and Todd’s could get messed up.  It’s just cleaner to stick with my original plan.”  He got up and walked toward the door.  “I don’t want to talk about it any more.  Please just get me back in at Mid-Town Plaza, okay?”

Seven weeks later, ‘Santa’ was back in the familiar surroundings of North Pole Village at Mid-Town Plaza.  Nothing there had changed during his one-year deflection to the pet store.

One thing, however, was different.  It was his attitude.  He couldn’t get himself psyched-up for the role.  He tried, but he was just going through the motions.  His mind kept wondering what the Elvis impersonator was doing at North Pointe Mall.  “What does he look like?  Can he sing?  Are a lot of people showing up to watch?  Do the people really dig him?"

Santa struggled with these questions for almost three weeks.  The more he thought about it, the more convinced he became that the impersonator looked the part and sang great, and had huge cheering audiences.  Finally, he could stand it no more.  “I’m gonna go over to North Point Mall and check this dude out.”

Santa finished his shift at 4 PM and immediately left Mid-Town Plaza.  He was still in full costume as he headed across town in his new 1985 black Cadillac.  A flyer from the Sunday paper was beside him on the front seat.  It said the Elvis impersonator would be performing until six that day.

Twenty minutes later Santa walked down the mall concourse, the sound of Elvis music getting louder as he neared the stage.  Well, he sings pretty good, but he don’t look nothin’ like the real thing.

The impersonator was about the right height, but he was far too slender.  Also, the sequined jump suit looked poorly made and didn’t fit right.  Santa paused, trying to look inconspicuous, as though that were possible.  A few shoppers noticed him, but they merely smiled and continued on their way.

Santa watched the show intently for two or three minutes. Beads of sweat appeared on his forehead, and his stomach tightened into a knot.  A long-dormant fire raged within him as he listened to the man singing the words to ‘Blue Christmas.’

The song ended, and the Elvis went down the stage steps to help the next child up and into the gold Cadillac.

Santa quickly walked to the side of the steps.  “Say, Elvis.  You know you’re really cuttin’ into my crowds at Mid-Town Plaza this year.”

“Sorry about that, man.  No hard feelings, I hope.  It’s just a job.”

“I know, but you could make me feel a lot better if you’d do me a big favor.”

“What’s that?”

“Why don’t you let me get up on the stage and do one song?  The people would probably get a kick out of seeing Santa singing Elvis music, you know.”

“Well, I guess it would be okay.  I could use a break to sit down.  After four hours of this, your legs start to give out.”

“There you go.  Thanks buddy.  Say, do you have a tape of ‘Santa Clause Is Back In Town’?’”

“Oh, yeah.”

“Well, would you put it on, please?”

Santa bounded up the steps.  His body was not that of a young man, but, at that moment, his mind was.  It felt just like old times when he grabbed the mike off the stand and began to strut across the stage.  It was show-time!

The tape player blared.  As if by instinct, Santa belted out the first words.  His voice, though a little raspier than it had been years earlier, still caught the attention of the people near the stage.  Santa had the sound, the moves, the attitude.  He caught a glimpse of the Elvis impersonator, whose jaw dropped, dumbfounded.

The shoppers noticed the familiar voice, too.  The crowd moved closer to the stage, and more people came down the concourse to get a closer look.

Santa sang and hammed it up as if he had practiced for weeks.  Twice, he reached up to his neck to grab a scarf to toss into the audience, but there wasn’t any to grab.  Underneath the Santa hat and beard, his face glowed with happiness.  This was the best; he was in the groove.  The crowd of curious shoppers continued to grow.

The song came to its rousing finish.  The music stopped, and for a second there was a strange silence.  Then the applause started.  It quickly grew to a crescendo.  A thirty-something woman standing with two others shouted out, “Oh, Santa,” and did a pretend swoon.  Her girlfriends caught her, and the three laughed and shrieked like giddy schoolgirls.

Santa basked in the glow for about a minute.  Reality struck when he remembered his situation.  I better get out of here.  I don’t want mall security to show up.  He headed to the steps.

The crowd was slow to part when he reached the floor.  One of the three ladies laughed and shoved a pen and a piece of paper in his face and said, “Oh, please, Santa, autograph this for me.”

He tried to move past her but noticed the paper was actually that flyer promoting the Elvis impersonator.  His nostrils flared, and his upper lip curled.  “Yeah, you bet I will.”

He took the felt pen and put a big X over the impersonator’s picture.  Then he flipped the sheet over and wrote on the back, “Merry Christmas from Elvis Claus, Santa’s Favorite Brother.”  The woman squealed when she read it.

From behind Santa another woman’s arm pushed through the crowd.  It held a sheet of glossy paper, folded in quarters.  “Please sign this too, Santa.”

He reached for it.  “Sure, sure, but I’ve gotta split right quick.”  He unfolded the paper and did a double-take.  It was a copy of a color photo -- of Judy Parker, her golden retriever, Mac, and him – in the Santa costume with the beard pulled down.  He looked up, saw her face, her wide smile, her sparkling eyes.

“Hi Santa.  Haven’t seen you in a while.  Have you missed me?”

He sighed.  “Oh, very much.  You don’t know how much.”

“Yes I do, cause I’ve missed you the same.  Hey, you said you needed to split.  Let’s go.  I’ve got lots of news to tell you about.”

Santa looked around.  He did need to get going.  He made a move through the crowd, and she followed him.

“Judy, I don’t know if you should go with me.  It’ll be just like before.”  They were out of the crowd now, and walking briskly down the hallway.

“That’s what I’m counting on.”

“No, I mean afterward.”

I’ll take my chances on that.  You’re stuck with me now -- for the rest of the night.”

He sighed again.  “Okay. . . . I take it Todd’s not at home tonight.”

“No, he’s in Colorado.  That’s one of the things I want to tell you about.”

He didn’t immediately answer.  They kept walking, and the exit doors were now in sight.  “Say, how’d you know I was here?” he asked, trying to change the subject.

“That was easy.  Aunt Mary moved her craft store to this mall, and I work part-time for her now.  Her store is practically in front of that stage, so we could hear everything.  I almost gagged every time that impersonator got up on stage.”  Judy stuck two fingers in her mouth, an they both chuckled a little.  “I’m afraid I ditched a customer the second I heard your voice, but I caught almost all of your show from the doorway.”

“Where’d the picture of us come from?” he asked, still walking steadily toward the exit.

Right out of my pocketbook.  I keep a copy of the original folded up in there, so I can pull it out every once in a while and look at you.  When that lady asked you for an autograph, I ran back in the store and grabbed it.

“I nearly freaked when I opened it up and saw what it was.” he said.   ‘Your surprises keep getting better every year.  Say, how’d you like my singing?”

“I loved it”

 “I was pretty good, wasn’t I?”

“You’re always good.”

He laughed.  “Are you going to pull my beard down again this year?”

“Yes, that and other things, too.”

“I never knew Santa Claus had groupies.”

Judy laughed and gave him a gentle shove to the shoulder. They came to the exit door and went into the night. 

Judy Parker and Elvis Claus had left the building.

 

©  2007  Philip R Arnold   All rights Reserved   www.elvisblog.net